When I signed up for therapy work, I have all kinds of fantasy about how interesting my cases would be. By "interesting", I mean each case would be new and different from each other and some may allow me to experience the drama I try to avoid in my personal life. However, I do not expect any of them to be too dramatic. Say, an case related to FBI but not under any influence of schizophrenia is ok. But not the one I almost have today.

Noticing my schedule of 2 assessments and 1 counseling session kind of indicates a normal day. I was called up to the front desk about 1:15, way far earlier comparing to the normal pre-session notice time. The front desk lady Ms. L handed over me my 2 o'clock client's file. She told me: "Hey, Yufei, I hope you are doing well. I just want to warn you that this client was very mean and angry the other day when he came here for the assessment. He cursed me out all the way through the time he was here. I was scared and almost push the panic button. I just want to let you know in ahead of the time so you will be prepared."

(In my small little head...)

....well...........o...k..... now I was told to be prepared....o..k....but..... what this suppose to mean.... em....let me see... a violent client for Anger Management Assessment.... who happened to have drug abuse problems as well and is mandated for another Addiction Assessment...well, I hope not with me again...could him be seen by somebody else for Addiction Assessment?..wait...I guess if I see him now, it is likely that he will be scheduled with me again...but that is not something I want... although I am not sure how I feel about seeing him in an hour but I am pretty sure that I probably would not like to see him for a second time....

Ms. L suddenly remembered something else, something seemed to be very important. "Oh, one more thing. Could you do me a favor and let the client know he has to prepay the $50 for the Addiction Assessment requested by his PO?"

(Again, in my small little head...)

....do you a favor....em....sounds like you are desperate to let me take over this...so you do not need to have the verbal exchange with him again...well... you may still need to talk to him, but at least not one more conversation.... I guess the therapist is the one that is good at handling difficult conversation....euh?....

When I was still processing what these pieces of information actually mean, I saw the relieved smile coming out of Ms. L's face as she was saying "Thanks" to me. Now I am with the file on the way to my office, the room I will spend the session with this client in an hour. It was not until I sat in front of my computer did I realize what all these mean. I was reading his files and trying to figure out how violent this client could be, with all the information I had, including the hand writing, the words he wrote on the form, the information he filled... just about everything. I guess from this point, I was as desperate as Ms. L felt when she asked me to do her a favor. I even went to the restroom at 1:35 just try to get myself fully prepared for the tough session.....(I seriously did that? Yes... I am afraid I did...)

One thing that I always remember in all these years of study came to mind at this moment - "when you are about to have a panic attack, contact your supervisor for a band-aid advice." Ha-a-ha, so, I wrote an emergency letter to my supervisor asking for safety tips. It was lucky that she replied me at 2:06, when my client is still not coming. She told me: "If the client appears to have a problem you do not have to see him. You can terminate the session and if you feel threatened you can use the panic button." Oh, panic button!!! Now I figured out what Ms. L mean when she talked about pushing the panic button. There is actually a button called panic button!!! Here it was, at 2:10, I began a treasure hunt in the office looking for the panic button. When something important is happening and it is related to your own safety, all of a sudden, you are just going to be the smartest person in the world and respond with the fastest speed you could ever imagine yourself with. At 2:12, I was holding the 4-button panel and feeling soooo relieved.

Meanwhile, I talked to Yan Baobao when all these were happening, which I later found very entertaining. So, I am just going to put it here for you to have a little fun: